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September 26, 2007

soft . . . .


A Cushion For Your Head

Just sit there right now.
Don't do a thing.
Just rest.
For you separation from God, from love, is the hardest work in this world.
Let me bring you trays of food and something that you like to drink.
You can use my soft words as a cushion for your head ~ Hafiz (1320-1389)

Posted by jen at 08:40 AM   |   link   |   Comments (0)

September 24, 2007

remembering. . . . .

soft, canon 20d

a year ago we received the news that we had lost
a dear soul. a brother, an uncle, a friend, a son...
it was a painful time.
and sometimes,... it still is.
i am reminded especially when i see the quietness in his father's eyes,
or in knowing his sister still wakes up in the middle of the night, confused
and rattled by her brother's sudden departure.

its a mystery. . .why some of us make it and why some of
us cant seem to get free from the pain.

even those who are surrounded with the best kind of love.

sometimes you try and you try and you try and you try,
but you still cant reach through the darkness enough
to grab the hand that needs it so badly.

and sometimes, a soul gets so worn down, they dont
even recognize the extended hand is one of help.

pain messes up our perceptions.

i dont get alot of things...
but i do get that jon is now in a place and time of complete
beauty, peace, and freedom.

and i do get that if he could, he would tell each of us
that we could not possibly control the path he took.
and we owe it to him to live as fully as we can,
and love even more. because deep down thats what
he really wanted for himself,
he just wasnt able to get there this time around.

i am thinking of all of you right now. . .

i have not forgotten.

i pray that tonight when you rest your head, you are not haunted,
but somehow comforted by the knowing that jon is
really okay. and that you will be okay too.


Posted by jen at 03:54 PM   |   link   |   Comments (0)

September 21, 2007

for you. . . . .

lushy,canon 20 d

“Your heart is my piñata.” ~ chuck palahniuk

Posted by jen at 02:11 PM   |   link   |   Comments (0)

September 17, 2007

september. . . . .

outside sepia, canon 20 d ~ photo by barron

fall visited this weekend. boots and sweaters
and scarves. burning leaves and acorn crunches.
the trees are beginning to bleed and once again
we are all reminded why we are lucky to live in the

so we went to the Renegade craft show in the city.
there was an ABUNDANCE of creativity and originality.
Many people I must plug, but to start out,
one of my biggest delights was discovering these skirts by
Orangy Porangy
they fit perfectly and shout with color.

the music of the Gabe Dixon Band filled my head,
the out of control yummy at Sepia filled my belly,
and time with the one i love, filled my heart.

Posted by jen at 11:30 AM   |   link   |   Comments (0)

September 13, 2007

core. . .

sister and brother, canon 20 d

just remember what really holds you ~ the weepies

Posted by jen at 08:40 AM   |   link   |   Comments (0)

September 11, 2007

and they danced, woodstock ~ canon 20d

Posted by jen at 06:09 PM   |   link   |   Comments (0)

September 06, 2007

for the girls...

deilcious, canon 20 d

Posted by jen at 02:48 PM   |   link   |   Comments (0)

September 05, 2007

Hafiz, part 2. . .

closed, canon 20 d

it was like when we were back in college and you introduced
me to wendell berry and i just could not get enough. . .

I Know The Way You Can Get

I know the way you can get
When you have not had a drink of Love:

Your face hardens,
Your sweet muscles cramp.
Children become concerned
About a strange look that appears in your eyes
Which even begins to worry your own mirror
And nose.

Squirrels and birds sense your sadness
And call an important conference in a tall tree.
They decide which secret code to chant
To help your mind and soul.

Even angels fear that brand of madness
That arrays itself against the world
And throws sharp stones and spears into
The innocent
And into one's self.

O I know the way you can get
If you have not been drinking Love:

You might rip apart
Every sentence your friends and teachers say,
Looking for hidden clauses.

You might weigh every word on a scale
Like a dead fish.

You might pull out a ruler to measure
From every angle in your darkness
The beautiful dimensions of a heart you once

I know the way you can get
If you have not had a drink from Love's

That is why all the Great Ones speak of
The vital need
To keep remembering God,
So you will come to know and see Him
As being so Playful
And Wanting,
Just Wanting to help.

That is why Hafiz says:
Bring your cup near me.
For all I care about
Is quenching your thirst for freedom!

All a Sane man can ever care about
Is giving Love!

From: 'I Heard God Laughing - Renderings of Hafiz'  
Translated by Daniel Ladinsky

Posted by jen at 09:46 AM   |   link   |   Comments (0)

September 04, 2007

Hafiz. . .

what you whisper, barga, italy ~ canon 20d


Love wants to reach out and manhandle us,
Break all our teacup talk of God.

If you had the courage and
Could give the Beloved His choice, some nights,
He would just drag you around the room
By your hair,
Ripping from your grip all those toys in the world
That bring you no joy.

Love sometimes gets tired of speaking sweetly
And wants to rip to shreds
All your erroneous notions of truth

That make you fight within yourself, dear one,
And with others,

Causing the world to weep
On too many fine days.

God wants to manhandle us,
Lock us inside of a tiny room with Himself
And practice His dropkick.

The Beloved sometimes wants
To do us a great favor:

Hold us upside down
And shake all the nonsense out.

But when we hear
He is in such a “playful drunken mood”
Most everyone I know
Quickly packs their bags and hightails it
Out of town.

~ Hafiz ~

(The Gift – versions of Hafiz by Daniel Ladinsky)

Posted by jen at 09:28 AM   |   link   |   Comments (0)

September 03, 2007

mornings with ben

mr. ben, canon 20 d (taken by andrea)

my favorite time i think was when he would first wake
up. sleepy eyed and smiley and snuggly. happy.
perhaps the most comforting thing in the whole
wide world was sitting with him in my lap
listening to him practice his new language,
"ma ma ma ma ma..."

and damn, when that boy smiled, it didnt matter
what ugly you carried inside ~ it just vanished ~
nothing seems to matter in that moment.

ive had a bit of a rough week.
and i was encouraged to do everything
that i know which gives me peace ~
nature, music, photography, reading rumi,
praying, ...

but what i would have loved the most was to have
a morning with ben.

this little being, doesnt even know
how powerful he is just being on the planet .

a few pounds of straight up love and beauty.

just like his momma.

Posted by jen at 09:15 AM   |   link   |   Comments (0)

September 01, 2007

saturday. . .

old george, canon20d

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”


Posted by jen at 04:10 PM   |   link   |   Comments (0)