best of me....
petals, canon 20d
you know when a song comes into your life at the very perfect moment
and its better than a book or a therapy session
or the little white pill that awaits you on your bathroom counter?
well i needed such a song this week and i got one.
"Best of Me" sang by the brilliant Chrisette Michelle:
I saw you again at the parlor,
Crossing the walk with your lady,
I caught your eye from a far off,
I noticed she wore a ring.
I found a smile against my will,
wish it was genuine....
I put away my desire
No more in love with you still,
Look I'm moving on....
Loved you, Lost you
Thought I gave you all the best of me,
We've departed, broken hearted,
I need to be free.
What we had was oh so lovely
I'll swallow my pain
It's my time to find the best of me ...
Can't be too tired to be begging
Can't be too tired to plead,
My mama made me much wiser,
What's mine will be just for me,
I'm trying hard to just focus,
I'm trying hard to sleep,
Promise I'm glad you're happy
When it's my time it will be.
Look I'm moving on.
All my life I've been just so foolish
All these times..
Not realizing the beauty that your eyes once saw in mine.
Loved you, Lost you
Thought I gave you all the best of me,
We've departed, broken hearted,
I need to be free
What we had was oh so lovely
I'll swallow my pain,
It's my time to find the best of me...
Posted by
jen at 06:26 PM |
link |
Comments (0)
.......................
June 19, 2007
shedding......
cicada shells, canon 20 d
all im going to say is that im shedding some serious layers here ~ cutting the final ties, saying goodbye once and for all to the past ~
ive done my time.
and my time is over.
im sporting some brand new skin.
and its all mine.
like the cicadas, ive worn this old coat for 17 years and
its the right season to move into a new and passionate way of living.
and so it goes....
Posted by
jen at 06:26 PM |
link |
Comments (0)
.......................
June 13, 2007
summer . . .
porch goodies, canon 20d
im sorry i havent been on the computer much ~
im still in bliss mode of school being out for summer.
in the mean time, here are the things making me happy these days...
my brother chris, who just returned from a long
stretch in bethel alaska, playing with kipnuk
the happiest dog in the world...
karine polwart's music, especially daisy, song #3
mom's new find. fit flops are in, crocs are out.
the bizarre emergence of the cicadas. watch this video to see what all the fuss is about.
Posted by
jen at 09:41 AM |
link |
Comments (0)
.......................
June 07, 2007
the end.....
barga of course, canon 20d
today was graduation.
caps and gowns and awards....
and then they were gone.
and the halls were quiet.
and it was strange.
afterwards, i sat around with the therapists, the detective,
the intervention staff,
and my fellow teachers.
it was one hell of a year.
we had survived the war within these walls and it leaves
us with a bond that is hard to describe.
this is by far the most difficlult job i have ever had.
what makes it this way is not knowing if all the blood sweat and tears
made any kind of real difference.
i can only hope.
god bless all you teachers out there.
enjoy your well deserved summer...
Posted by
jen at 03:38 PM |
link |
Comments (0)
.......................
June 05, 2007
yes.. ... ...
italy~ canon 20d
reasons why im smiling today:
its the last full day with my students
we sold our house
my brother is moving back from alaska
its the last full day with my students
my new place has three porches to hang out on
Ravinia this weekend
girl posse retreat this summer
its the last full day with my students
a trip to barga next month
its the last full day with my students
and
its the last full day with my students.
Posted by
jen at 05:55 AM |
link |
Comments (0)
.......................
June 03, 2007
happiness.....
boy on the farm, canon 20 d
he was right.
its as if i have a notion that i dont deserve happiness.
and when i experience it, i doubt it, fearing if i latch onto
it too tightly, mr. depression will sneak up and take it all
away again.
i am so aware of when i am feeling good ~ it was absent from
my life for so long that when it comes across me, its like a
brand new moment.
i know this sounds silly to some.
but simply feeling good is like a beautiful surprise.
i remember a time when i felt i had nothing to look forward
to. there was nothing i felt excited about , except for taking
my sleeping pill and going to bed.
god that was a brutal time.
i can feel my life coming back to me.
i can feel my interests awakening.
i feel the need to create and discover.
this week i have been purging memories of my past.
getting rid of clothes and photograhs and books and
letters and reminders of the life that is no more.
its been so freeing.
and so my life begins again.
and its looking like a happy one.
Posted by
jen at 09:10 AM |
link |
Comments (0)
.......................
