i have gone through a major transformation the past couple months
and maybe thats what happens. newly born, not able to form
the words of my heart.

here is the best i can do.
i finally feel my sadness has lifted.
after two years i no longer feel the dread.

i think i realized it when i found myself returning to
the things that used to light my fire.
exploring little places, connecting with strangers,
playing with my camera, drawing, and finally and most
importantly~ feeling passion and magic for my life,
for the simple, the strange, the wild.
forgiving and forgetting the things that just dont matter
anymore.
planning trips to the ocean and back to italy.
not minding sleeping alone.
actually feeling good that i am now divorced.

things like that.

all those marbles i thought i lost...
now found. and placed back nicely
in my messy
little head.