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July 29, 2004
SARK

SARK, Canon 300D
last night i had the wonderful delight of
visiting with SARK and attending her
magical, inspiring, and helpful workshop
~ Make Your Creative Dreams Real....
it was amazing.
she is amazing....
even though i have read every inch of her
latest book from cover to cover,
i learned so much from this workshop.
SARK has the ability to connect so
warmly and so beautifully with people,
and for me, that makes the impact of
her stories and guidance even more
effective in my heart. SARK is so, so,
supportive and encouraging to others.
afterwards, we went to the lovely bookstore ~
Transitions (who has a rock star staff) for SARK's
book signing where we enjoyed yummy chocolate cake
and beautiful music performed by Lisa Danielson.
i met tons of wonderful people ~ some who
had traveled hours just to attend this event....
such a fabulous night....
wish you could have been there...
thank you
thank you
dear sweet SARK.....
Posted by jen at 12:18 PM | link | Comments (1619)
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July 27, 2004
listen...

Drew, Canon 300D
"i listen to the wind
to the wind of my soul.
where i'll end up well i think,
only God really knows...
i listen to my words but
they fall far below.
i let my music take me where
my heart wants to go... " ~ cat stevens
Posted by jen at 11:33 AM | link | Comments (713)
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July 26, 2004
in a trance...

potter's hands, Canon 300D
its strange.
i feel calm today.
calm and quiet.
nothing has changed.
everything is exactly the same.
so why is it that i am not spinning?
oh yes, there is work to be done,
plenty to be concerned about,
loads to obsess over....
but not now.
its not that i dont care, its just not reaching or tearing at me.
im sitting in my huge, comfy, green chair, jen chapin is playing, the sun is peeking through the curtains, my cat is asleep on my lap.
i dont want to move.
i want to soak this up.
thank you thank you ...
whatever this is.
did someone pray?
....or did someone sneak some xanax into my tea?
Posted by jen at 06:06 PM | link | Comments (341)
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July 23, 2004
hand blessing....

deb's belly ~ 6 months, Canon 300D
Photo Friday's challenge this week is "mother"....
Posted by jen at 06:19 AM | link | Comments (835)
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July 22, 2004
inside my head...

head shot, Canon 300D
its about an hour ride home on the train.
and god forbid i just sit back and relax...
i have to drink in the entire scene,
every single detail of the
lives riding with me.
yesterday, there was the man who could hardly fit in the seat because of his weight, and a woman next to him who gave him a glaring look just to add to his discomfort. i could see from 9 rows back how heavy he was breathing. i wanted to give him my bottle of water but thought it might embarrass him further. i also wanted to dump that same water on that meanie sitting next to him.
there was the young, and nervous mother who was doing her best to juggle her overactive child. she was so embarrassed when that little hand slapped her in the face ~ she laughed, but i think she wanted to hit the child right back. instead she did the old "arm-squeeze" which sent the child into ear-piercing screams.
and then there was the north-shore hottie, who was on his cell, making deals left and right...i noticed when he ended the conversation he looked out the window and sighed deeply. he looks tired of the dance. he fell asleep almost immediately.
the construction worker, who was dripping with sweat, popped open the 32-ouncer the second he sat down. he finished it by the time we hit the 3rd stop. his pregnant wife was there waiting at the station. i noticed his angry face lit up when he saw her.
there was an elderly woman who wore a wool cap. how she could stand it in this heat? she seemed to be talking to her reflection in the window. she rubbed her thumb and pointer finger together the entire time. her other hand held onto a big bag which was filled with lots of other bags. where does she go? where does she live? what is she hearing inside her head?
by the time i get to my stop i am exhausted.
my sweet husband is there to meet me and asks, "How did the day go?" ...
for a moment i forgot that i had spent the day working,
i was still thinking about the people on the train...
Posted by jen at 10:41 AM | link | Comments (1338)
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July 20, 2004
small calm thing...

bee balm, Canon300D
"Ours is not the task of fixing the entire world all at once, but of stretching out to mend the part of the world that is within our reach. Any small, calm thing that one soul can do to help another soul, to assist some portion of this poor suffering world, will help immensely.
It is not given to us to know which acts or by whom, will cause the critical mass to tip toward an enduring good. What is needed for dramatic change is an accumulation of acts, adding, adding to, adding more, continuing. We know that it does not take "everyone on Earth" to bring justice and peace, but only a small, determined group who will not give up during the first, second, or hundredth gale.
One of the most calming and powerful actions you can do to intervene in a stormy world is to stand up and show your soul." ~Clarissa Pinkola Estes
Posted by jen at 10:07 AM | link | Comments (997)
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July 19, 2004
stepping gently....

dancing in madison, Canon 300D
everything seems so loud today.
for the past few days, a cow moo was my alarm clock.
for the past few days, i was surrounded by big skies and acres of green.
for the past few days, i laughed so hard with friends
that my stomach muscles are still sore.
for the past few days, i felt so calm, so in my own skin, so at ease....
for the past few days, i didn't seem to worry about a single thing....
in fact, i would dare say i was doing the "living in the present" thingy.
is the answer in moving to the country?
i know ... i know....
but i would like to learn to feel the way i feel out there,
when i am back here.
is it possible?
for today, i am going to try to limit the
constant static of stimuli around me.
for today, i am going to keep all the electronics turned off.
for today, i am going to use the back porch as my office space.
for today, i am going to listen to my body
and not rush ahead of it as i so often do.
for today, i am going to discover one little treasure
in my garden that i have neglected to find.
i know the transition from solitude into the chaos of reality takes a little time. but maybe i could make it a little less severe by stepping gently back in.
now, if i could just get somebody to moo outside my window,
i think it would be just about perfect...
Posted by jen at 09:34 AM | link | Comments (456)
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July 13, 2004
simple...

orange petals, Canon 300D
some simple country living is on the agenda this week.
there is nothing like being out in the middle of nowhere
to settle me down and remind me of who i am and what i love.
i call it my de-tox trip ~
no phone
no computer
no tv
no deadlines
no traffic
no noise
no pressure.....
all i need to wear is my bib overalls and a tank top.
all i need to bring is my fishing pole and a sleeping bag.
all i need to do is take in the wide open skies.
all i need to think about is....is....absolutely nothing.
i wish for you to take a little time this week,
to do what you love.
even if it feels like a big effort to do it.
even if it is only 20 minutes.
even if your to-do list is taller than the refrigerator.
i promise you will
feel better for having done so....
see ya in a few days.....
Posted by jen at 10:37 AM | link | Comments (889)
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July 10, 2004
worry...

water lily, Canon 300D
very gently
he said to me,
"i know that you worrying about me
is an expression of your love,
but when you 'worry'
i feel like you are doubting my soul's ability to find its
way through this world.
i believe you care deeply, and i love
the way you love,
but all your worrying imparts the thought-form
of doubt for me."
i never looked at it this way.
but it did ring true...
i dont think i will ever stop worrying about people i love,
but it's definitely in need of some balance.
i have exhausted myself
and lost days consumed with it.
it's the one area of my life that i have
struggled with the most.
i really want to change.
i know i have a long way to go in this department, but i am
willing to start practicing a healthier alternative ~ one that
demonstrates hope and trust in the ability of the
spirit.
so for now, when i begin to spin with worry,
i will consider instead, switching that energy into
a whispered blessing. i will imagine speaking directly
with your soul, acknowledging its wisdom, its strength,
its beauty, and its connection to the divine.
Posted by jen at 10:11 AM | link | Comments (788)
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July 09, 2004
Photo Friday

sno kone, Canon 300D
This week's challenge at Photo Friday is "cool"....
Posted by jen at 07:48 AM | link | Comments (194)
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July 07, 2004
still...

sky writer, Canon 300D
Time stands still best
in moments that look suspiciously
like ordinary life ~ brian andreas
Posted by jen at 01:05 PM | link | Comments (601)
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July 06, 2004
this works for me...

farm flower, Canon 300D
but at the creek I slow down,
center down, empty.
i am not excited; my breathing is slow and regular.
...i am saying nothing....i go calm...
i center down.
i find balance and repose.
i retreat ~ not inside myself, but outside myself, so that
i am a tissue of senses. whatever i see is plenty, abundance.
i am the skin of water the wind plays over; i am petal, feather, stone.
annie dillard ~ pilgrim at tinker creek
as i have shared before, traditional meditation just
doesnt work for me.... i have tried and tried and tried,
but i end up more frustrated and irritated afterwards,
because i definitely fail at the attempts.
but sitting out in the country or tucked in a pile of
woods, i can be still and i can stop the chatter.
give me even 5 minutes of this and i feel a marked
difference inside. this is what works for me.
this is my kind of meditation.
and you?
Posted by jen at 09:03 AM | link | Comments (888)
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July 03, 2004
andrea

andrea light, Canon 300D
i had the great delight of having my friend andrea in for
a visit... we roamed the city of chicago, hung out at the farm,
strolled around the flea market, rode bikes along the river,
crept inside old buildings, and kicked back out on the porch....
the best part however,
was just spending time with a true friend,
easy and effortless,
kind and familiar....
thank you andrea :)
come back and visit us again soon....
Posted by jen at 10:24 PM | link | Comments (830)
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July 01, 2004
train tombs....

train day, Canon 300D
what i love the most about my camera is
that it takes me to places i would normally
pass by... it draws my attention to the details...
today the camera brought us to wander the
rails of an old train cemetery...
Posted by jen at 03:41 PM | link | Comments (1093)
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